I’m a man of my word, and that word was a promise to give you fine, thirsty folks a free, descriptive taste of the 19 Oregon-made, German-style beers we’ll be tapping tomorrow for GermanFest. Here’s a little tease to get those tastebuds talking:

10 Barrel German Sparkle Party
Berliner Weisse, 4% ABV
Berliner Weisse is a sour, tart, fruity, effervescent ale often referred to as the champagne of beers for its light and sparkly texture. Traditionally, because of the tartness, it is rarely consumed straight and instead consumed with a shot of raspberry or woodruff syrup.

BaseCamp Rauch the Boat
Rauchbier, 5.1% ABV
This crisp dark ruby lager is brewed with a healthy dose of German rauch (smoked) malt and a touch of bittering hops to provide upfront balance; the smoky bite of rauch malt complements this beer’s dark chocolate and caramel body. Cellaring results in a clean, rich body and finish.

Block 15 Lemon Gose
Gose, 3.5% ABV
Pronounced “go-suh,” this German-style wheat beer is brewed with malted wheat, acidulated malt, salt, and Meyer lemon juice and peel. Refreshingly tart with a touch of salinity, notes of citrus and wheat.

Breakside Kellerbier
Kellerbier/Alt Hybrid, 5.5% ABV
Our Kellerbier is a hybrid of authentic Kellerbiers–unfiltered, cellared Bavarian-style lagers–and the light bodied, hoppy Altbiers of northern Germany. Deep red in color with a generous amount of German aroma hops balanced against bready malt notes.

The Commons Pils
Pilsner, 4.9% ABV
Featuring a dry, clean, crisp body with a strong, floral, Noble hop bitterness, The Commons Pils is brewed in the tradition of classic Northern German Pilsners which tend to be drier and hoppier than their Czech cousins.

Falling Sky Spelt Rebel
Dinkelbier, 5% ABV
Dinkel is German for spelt, an heirloom wheat variety that became the staple grain of peasants from the Bronze Age to medieval times. Capture aromas of clove, banana and bubblegum while adventuring with flavors of sweet bread and a spicy dry finish.

Flat Tail License to Pils
Imperial Pilsner, 7.5% ABV
A stronger, fuller bodied Pilsner with Weyermann Pilsner and Vienna malts and a generous heaping of all German Hallertauer Mittlefrue hops. An American riff on a classic recipe.

Gigantic Dark Meddle
Vienna Lager, 5.9% ABV
Our craft homage to the Vienna-style Lager brewed by our favorite Mexican grupo. A malty, full-flavored dark brew made with tasty German malts and piloncillo cane sugar.

Heater Allen Rauch Dunkel
Smoked Dunkel, 5.1% ABV
Comprised of 23% Beech smoked malt in the grist, this dark lager features hints of chocolate and a gentle smokiness that evokes subtle flavors of bacon and other smoked meats.

Hopworks Cultivator Doppelbock
Doppelbock, 6.4% ABV
Meant to sustain monks during times of fasting, this traditional German lager is a rich, delicious meal in a glass with the same bready, toasty malt character of a bock, but with ‘double’ the intensity. A healthy portion of Munich malts contribute a velvety body while a slightly higher alcohol content lends fruity notes of raisin and fig.

Humble Dusseldorf Rye Alt
Dusseldorf Altbier, 5.7% ABV
A Dusseldorf Altbier with a rye malt addition atop a Pilsen and Munich malt base, single hopped with Hallertauer. Alts are hybrid ale/lagers that use a special ale yeast that ferments at cooler temperatures, resulting in both fruity ale flavors and the cleaner body and finish of a lager.

Laurelwood Leatherman Lager
Marzen, 4.9% ABV
A delicious malt focused version of the popular Oktoberfest style, Leatherman Lager combines toasted malt, biscuit and bready notes with a robust body and a deep and brilliant red hue. Pairs particularly well with spicy foods as its sweeter malt body extinguishes the hottest of fires.

Lompoc Spring Bock
Maibock, 7.7% ABV
This lager was brewed with a generous amount of Munich malt to develop its deep amber color and rich malt flavor. That maltiness is balanced with a spicy hop bitterness. Maibocks are spring versions of darker winter bocks and are usually a bit lighter in both body and malt character.

Oakshire Auslaufen Rauchbier
Rauchbier, 5.6% ABV
Auslaufen Rauchbier is made with a special malt smoked over Cherry wood for a soft and sweet smoke flavor and aroma. It is a bright mahogany colored ale with a medium body and a balanced bitterness. The smoke clings on the palate, yet the beer finishes refreshing.

Occidental Bourbon Barrel Aged Lucubrator
Doppelbock, 7% ABV
A dark, strong lager, slightly sweet with a complex malt profile, this version of the Lucubrator has picked up an additional two months of barrel-aging since its winter release. The barrel-aging gives the beer a warm, well-rounded feel, while adding hints of vanilla and alcohol.

Silver Moon Back Country Bock
Maibock, 7.0% ABV
A traditional Maibock fermented with our house lager yeast and cold conditioned for four months. Weyermann Munich, Pilsner, and Caramel malts provide rich malty flavors and a medium body. Small additions of German Magnum and US Mt. Hood hops give a hint of spice and balance.

Upright Gose
Gose, 5.2% ABV
Based on an obscure centuries-old German style that incorporates salt and coriander into a distinctly tart wheat beer with a dry champagne-like finish.

Widmer Brothers Brotha From Anotha Motha
Bavarian Hefeweizen, 5.8% ABV
A Pilsner and Wheat malt backbone provides a clean, subtle maltiness which is rounded out by the addition of Munich malt. Flavors of clove and banana from the yeast provide unparalleled complexity and, left in suspension, provide a luxurious mouthfeel which lends body to an otherwise dry beer.

Worthy Easy Day Kolsch
Kolsch, 4.5% ABV
A light, crisp, straw-colored beer brewed with imported Munich malt and a touch of wheat, Perle hops for bittering and Willamette hops for a hint of old Europe spiciness, and the tart green apple aroma of a true Kolsch yeast. An effervescent front end segues into a soft mouthfeel that finishes dry and pleasantly bitter.

Just when you thought you’d never get another chance to pull out those lederhosen, here comes GermanFest!

The extravaganza kicks off at 4 PM this Saturday, April 27th, for general admission (or 2 PM if you managed to get your hands on VIP tickets).  There’s no charge to enter the fest, no tickets, no souvenir glasses, and as usual, we’ll be accepting both cash and credit cards. Just drop by anytime between 4:00 PM – 11:30 PM to check out 19 German-style brews concocted by your favorite local Oregon breweries.

This year, we’ve managed to cajole some of our favorite brewers from years past into concocting styles both familiar and off-the-wall unheard of, so whether it’s a Kolsch or a Dinkel (not to be confused with a Dunkel), there will be plenty of options for both Germamateur and Germaster alike. We’ve also reached out to some of Oregon’s newest and most exciting breweries like Worthy, Humble, Falling Sky, and Base Camp to see how their brew kettles stand up to the challenge.

For those who haven’t had a chance to see the full list yet, take a gander and then check back here on Friday for a more complete and detailed description of each brew.

• 10 Barrel Berliner Weisse
• BaseCamp Rauch the Boat
• Block 15 Lemon Gose
• Breakside Kellerbier
• The Commons Pilsner
• Falling Sky Dinkel
• Flat Tail License to Pils Imperial Pilsner
• Gigantic Dark Meddle Vienna Lager
• Heater Allen Rauch Dunkel
• Hopworks Cultivator Doppelbock
• Humble Dusseldorf Rye Alt
• Laurelwood Leatherman Lager Marzen
• Lompoc Spring Bock
• Oakshire Auslaufen Rauchbier
• Occidental Bourbon Barrel Aged Lucubrator Doppelbock
• Silver Moon Back Country Bock
• Upright Gose
• Widmer Brothers Brotha From Anotha Motha Bavarian Hefeweizen
• Worthy Kolsch

We hope you’ve all gotten over that New Year’s Resolution to cut down on drinking nonsense and that come this weekend you’re ready to give your tastebuds a caressing and your liver a beatdown. CellarFest 2013 kicks off this Saturday, January 19th, at 4 PM (or 2 PM if you happen to be one of the lucky few who snagged tickets to our now sold-out VIP event) and we’ve got our best list yet of aged barleywines, imperial stouts, and Belgian strong ales.

For those unfamiliar with our CellarFest, here’s the gist: most beers get worse with age, but a select few gain a deeper complexity and in the process lose the telltale alcoholic burn or syrupy sweetness that oft times prove overwhelming to the palate. Our mission is to take these unique brews and set them aside until such time as we can reintroduce them into a thirsty world that is ready to appreciate them anew.

As usual, we’ll be serving 4 oz and 10 oz pours, the former at prices ranging from $2 to $4 and the latter at prices between $4 and $8. There is no admission at the door and no other additional cost of any sort; you only pay for what you drink.

Our hours will be the normal Saturday hours, from 4 PM until Midnight, with a last call around 11:30.

And now, to get those tastebuds salivating properly, here’s our complete draft list with full descriptions of each beer!

-Alaskan Barleywine (2008)- A full-bodied Barleywine, deep mahogany in color and brewed with an array of complementing malts to achieve its high original gravity. Multiple hop additions in the boil and dry hopping during fermentation provide contrast to the big malt character. Gains deeper malt complexity and smoothness over time. 10.7% ABV

-Bend Wicked Medicine (2010)- Belgian Strong Ale with aromatic teases of ripe bananas, sweet candy and warm spices. Tastes of sweet malt, dark mexican sugar and underlying cherry essence. 10.6% ABV

-Block 15 Figgy Pudding (2010)- A Holiday Strong Ale brewed with English pale and specialty malts and molasses. Matured in freshly emptied brandy barrels and conditioned with mission figs. Gently spiced with the world’s finest ceylon cinnamon and whole nutmeg. 11% ABV

-Boulder Obovoid Oak Aged Oatmeal Stout (2010)- As dark as deep space, this chewy Oatmeal Stout is aged on oak that adds an earthy character to its roasted notes and is brewed with black and chocolate malts to provide a bittersweet chocolate finish. 6.8% ABV

-Deschutes The Dissident (2010)- Fermented for more than 18 months with the wild yeast strain brettanomyces, this distinctive Oud Bruin, or Flanders-style brown ale, features a fruity aroma and flavor. Partially aged in pinot and cabernet barrels for over 3 months and with Central Washington cherries for a full year. 11% ABV

-Dogfish Head Red & White (2010)- A big, Belgian-style Wit brewed with coriander and orange peel and fermented with Pinot Noir juice. After fermentation a fraction is aged in Oregon Pinot Noir barrels, and another fraction is aged on oak staves. The beer is blended together to marry the refreshing citrusy qualities of a Belgian-style white beer with the robust complexity of a bold red wine. 10% ABV

-Fort George Cavatica Stout (2008)- An immense, bold, black as night Imperial Stout; Cavatica is no dry Irish anything. Made in the tradition of Terminator, except stronger, one sip and you will surely take notice of what you’re drinking. The name honors this brewer’s affinity with arachnia. Be forewarned, this beer will stain your clothes. 8.5% ABV

-Great Divide Old Ruffian (2009)- A hefty, hop-forward Barleywine. Seemingly mellow at first sniff, with its subtle fruit aromas and complex caramel sweetness, this deep mahogany-hued ale quickly shows its true character marked by bold hop flavors and massive hop bitterness. Old Ruffian’s rich, slightly creamy, caramel malt mouthfeel balances its grapefruit, pine, and floral hop flavors, working wonders on your palate. 10.3% ABV

-Lagunitas Gnarleywine (2008)- A Barleywine built to last. Flavors evolve as hop bitterness yields to crazy caramel and rich toffee flavors. 10.6% ABV

-Laurelwood Moose & Squirrel (2010)- Dark as night, thick and rich. Big roast and coffee flavors dominate this beer. The Russian Imperial Stout was first brewed for the Russian royal court. Today, this is one of our most highly anticipated winter releases. 8% ABV

-Lompoc Old Tavern Rat (2009)- A very intense Strong Ale with a malty body and plenty of caramel, dried fruit and roast flavors. This is the ideal beer to keep you warm on a cold winter’s night. 9% ABV

-North Coast Old Stock (2009)- Brewed with classic floor-malted Maris Otter Pale Malt and Fuggles Hops imported from England, this robust Strong Ale features an original gravity of over 1100 and a generous hopping rate. Old Stock Ale is well-designed to round-out and mellow with age. 11.7% ABV

-Oakshire Collaborative Evil (2010)- An Imperial Porter brewed with black strap molasses and dark brown sugar, this potent brew combines heavy roast with rich chocolate and coffee notes. 8.7% ABV

-Oskar Blues Ten Fiddy (2010)- This titanic, immensely viscous Imperial Stout is loaded with inimitable flavors of chocolate-covered caramel and coffee and hides a hefty 98 IBUs underneath a smooth blanket of malt. Brewed with enormous quantities of two-row malt, chocolate malt, roasted barley, flaked oats and hops. 10.5% ABV

-Rogue Russian Imperial Stout (2005)- The Emperor of Stouts. Rich in texture, broad, soft and creamy, the Imperial Stout is the most robust and fullest of all stouts. Its high level of hopping is intended to preserve it during long trips and to provide a more bracing drink against cold climates. The color is very dark, nearly opaque black. Exhibits enormously powerful malt flavors, hints of dark fruits, and is surprisingly dry. 10.4% ABV

-Russian River Consecration (2009)- A Sour Belgian Strong Dark Ale aged in cabernet sauvignon barrels from local wineries. It is aged for 4 to 8 months with black currants, brettanomyces, lactobacillus, and pediococcus added to each barrel. Rich flavors of chocolate truffle, spice, tobacco, currants, and a bit of cabernet. Very full-bodied, sip slowly! 10% ABV

-Sierra Nevada 30th Anniversary Jack & Ken’s (2010)- A Black Barleywine rich with bittersweet and roasted malt flavors and balanced with whole-cone American hops, this robust ale should age gracefully for years. 10.2% ABV

-Southern Oregon Mrs. Claws (2010)- Mrs. Claws is a naughty little Barleywine crafted in a classic English style with a dark wheat and flaked oat element for a perfect body. Smooth and balanced but also complex and warming. 9.5% ABV

-Terminal Gravity Festivale (2008)- Brewed in the style of a British Strong or Old Ale. Huge and complex malt and hop flavors with a nice little alcoholic warmth in the finish. The color is deep ruby brown and it produces a fine cream colored cascading head. 8.3% ABV

Alright, all you Blockheads. We know you’re chomping at the bit to get your first taste of this year’s Kriek and Figgy Pudding. We’re not gonna lie; we are too. The opportunity for you (and us) is on Monday, November 19th, starting at 2 PM. Brewmaster Nick Arzner will be joining us as we tap seven Block 15 kegs and sell seven Block 15 bottles to go. Why seven, you ask? I don’t honestly know. It would have made sense if it had been seven and eight, thus equaling fifteen, but we’re not that clever, at least, not until we really have time to think about it in hindsight.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah! The scoop is that Nick will be with us until 5 PM, but bottles and draft will be available all night long, or at least, until we run out (which in the case of the bottles, could be pretty quick if I know my rabid Portland Blockhead like I think I do).

Draft offerings include Kriek, Figgy Pudding, Nebula Stout, Wonka’s Wit (Sour Wit), Fright Night (CDA), Fireside Brown, and Framboise White. We’ve got 1/4 bbls of each of these kegs, so with any luck most of these should last the evening.

The bottles, on the other hand…

The Kriek we’re limiting to 4 bottles per customer, and Figgy Pudding growlers are limited to 2 bottles per customer. These growlers have been specially prepared with counter pressuring by Arzner’s hardworking Corvallis crew ahead of time for the best seal possible. We’re also selling Strawberry Fields and Framboise White, limit 1 bottle each per customer. And we’ll have Provisions, Demon’s Farm, and Wandelpad available with no limit.

Any questions? I think that about covers it. We’ll see you Monday!

Alright, beer fans! Curtain’s coming off! Here’s the final, complete beer list for tomorrow’s BelgianFest, with full details and descriptions of each beer. Our two big reveals since Monday’s blog are listed directly below for your convenience.

**

Hair of the Dog/DeStruisse Pannepeuch
Quadrupel
10 ABV
A locally brewed version of DeStruisse’s world-class Pannepeut, this potent quad features aromas of raisins, prunes, and chocolate and melds bitter chocolate, mocha, and coffee on the palate with a hint of nutmeg and cinnamon.

Cascade Old Bing (2009)
Sour
6.5 ABV
This dark red ale was barrel-aged on Bing cherries for more than three years, then further aged with Bourbon vanilla beans for six months. Aromas of deep, dark cherry flesh and port are noticed up front. Rich, tawny port, black cherries and leather on the palate lead to pronounced cherry port and sherry notes that linger on the finish.

**

10 Barrel Cinnamon Kiss
Belgian Stout (NITRO)
6.6 ABV
The aroma is clean, revealing as it warms hints of roast malt intermingled with cinnamon. The flavor has a candy-like sweetness resulting from additions of dates and raisins in the boil. A kiss of cinnamon warms the palate as it trails off dry and unassuming.

Block 15 Framboise White
Imperial Sour Wit (Wine)
8.0 ABV
Belgian-style white ale open fermented with our special blend of Belgian yeast, lactobacillus, and brettanomyces. Matured three seasons in chardonnay barrels with organic golden raspberries from Denison Farm.

Boneyard Bonehead
Belgian Pale
6.5 ABV
Golden-to-straw in color, this BPA combines the delicious aromas and flavors of a Belgian Pale Ale with American hop varietals (Citra, Cascade, Centennial). Spicy and phenolic characteristics from Belgian yeast collide with tropical fruit and citrus from American hops. Toasty malt overtones.

Breakside Pumpkin Biere De Garde
Bier d’Automne
6.2 ABV
This French-inspired take on a pumpkin beer uses a cornucopia of uncommon herbs to create a complex, non-traditional pumpkin ‘spice beer.’ This vintage of Pumpkin Biere de Garde incorporates candy cap mushrooms, fresh ginger, Douglas fir needles, and Jacobsen sea salt.

Burnside International Incident
Belgian Wheat Wine (Gin)
8.6 ABV
An Imperial apricot wheat beer with toasted cardamom, cumin and fenugreek spices, as well as 400 pounds of apricot. Dry-hopped with 8 pounds of scotch bonnet and dandicut peppers. This particular version of the beer was aged in an Old Tom Gin Barrel with champagne mangos added for tartness/sourness.

The Commons Plum Bretta
Sour Farmhouse (Pinot Noir)
6.5 ABV
Farmhouse ale aged in Pinot Noir barrels for 10 months with Brettanomyces Bruxellensis, then subsequently aged on 90 lbs of hand-cut local Italian Plums for 5 weeks.

Deschutes Biere De Garde
Biere De Garde
4.7 ABV
This Farmhouse style ale was fermented with a fantastic strain of yeast that produces gorgeous esters. These fruit characteristics blend with the malt profile created by pilsner, wheat and munich malts. A light herbal and spicy hop character comes from European noble Saaz hops.

Flat Tail Ocho Sour
Belgian Dark Strong Sour (Bourbon)
10 ABV
This blended sour dark strong ale starts its journey with a lactic/Brett fermentation in second-run Buffalo Trace bourbon barrels. It’s then blended with 10% fresh Belgian Brown and 10% year-old Flat Tail Eight.

Gigantic The Royale
Belgian Pale
6.3 ABV
A beer fit for sophisticates and flaneurs, The Royale is a golden concoction of fruity and citrusy flavors meant for whiling away one’s time in brasseries, cafes and pubs, or anywhere friends can be found.

Hopworks Abbey
Dubbel
8.5 ABV
The first in a series of new beers from Hopworks featuring classic European beer styles filtered through our own Northwest perspective. Our Abbey ale is a rich, complex and bready weave of malty esters reminiscent of stone fruit flavors.

Laurelwood Cardinal Sin (Sour)
Sour Quadrupel
10 ABV
A carefully crafted blend of continental malts, spicy and earthy hops, and an Abbey-style yeast that results in a balanced beer with creamy malt textures and a big deep fruit aroma and flavor. We then added barrel aged amber ale that has been sitting on fresh cherries for several years, resulting in a sweet, tart, dark fruity beer. This particular version of the beer has had additional aging time in sour barrels.

Logsdon Oak Aged Bretta
Sour Saison (Oak)
8.0 ABV
Our organic Oak Aged Bretta is made with our Seizoen Bretta that is aged for a period of time to develop the wood aged character in the beer. Oak Tannins, vanilla notes, and subtle smoky spiciness soften and mellow this beer over time.

Lompoc Le Chat Noir (2009)
Belgian Dark
8.1 ABV
A Belgian style beer brewed in February 2009 with the Dutch Castle yeast strain giving off a slight acidity balanced with a dark fruit aroma and complex malt flavors.

Pfriem Belgian Tripel
Belgian Tripel
9.5 ABV
Inspired by traditional Belgian Tripels such as Westmalle Tripel, this beer delivers classic flavor with extra emphasis on the hops. White fluffy head on top of bright golden hues. Aromas of floral grass with hints of pear. Flavors of apricot are finessed with the spiciness from the hops. The palate is left with a zesty earthiness.

Pints Evil Twin Dark Saison
Dark Saison
6.7 ABV
Just in time for the season, this sweet malt, full-bodied farmhouse Saison blends malts from around the world (France, England, Germany and Chile). A heavy emphasis on chocolate malt adds deep color and complexity balanced with notes of raisin and subtle citrus. The hops are mild with little bitterness and a focus on aromatics.

Rogue Fifteen Thousand Brew Ale
Belgian Stout
6.5 ABV
Rogue Ales brewmaster John Maier has completed his 15,000th brew! This Belgian Stout combines nine key ingredients: 2-Row, C-75 and Wyermann Carafe Special II & III malts; Perle & Falconers Flight hops; and Belgian candi sugar, Belgian yeast and free range coastal water.

Silver Moon Oak Aged Purgatory’s Shadow
Belgian Dark
9.4 ABV
A complex Belgian style strong ale with spicy, earthy notes rich in dark fruit flavors. Purgatory also bring a soft roasted, caramel undertones. Brewed with Belgian dark candy sugar, Czech Saaz hops and a rare Canadian-Belgian yeast strain, this ale is like nothing you’ve tasted before. Aged 6 months in Volcano Vineyards White Oak Shiraz Barrels.

Upright/Bushwhacker Blend
Saison Perry (Gin)
5.5 ABV
One of only two kegs produced, a 60/40 blend of Bushwhacker’s pear cider and a Saison by Upright. The cider used allspice, cinnamon and ginger while the beer was made from the Batch Two Fantasia grist (sans peaches and Lactobacillus) and fermented with wit yeast plus Brettanomyces in an Old Tom gin barrel where it aged over a year.

Nobody loves Belgian beer as much as the Bailey’s crew, which is why for the third year in a row, we’re letting all those esters and adjuncts, fruit and funk run free on our taps. This year’s festival starts Saturday, November 10th at 4 PM for General Admission, or 2 PM for the VIP Experience.

What’s the difference, you ask?

General Admission begins at 4 PM and there’s no cost at the door. You pay for what you drink. Simple, right? Tastes (4 oz) cost either $2 or $3, depending on the beer, while fills (10-12 oz) will cost $4 or $6.

Meanwhile, VIP patrons will get a head-start on these twenty unique brews by gaining entry two hours earlier in a quieter, more relaxed atmosphere. Because admission is limited there will be plenty of seats available and no long lines or crowding. Tickets are only $25 and include the cost of your first six 4 oz tastes (HINT! if you’re smart about your free tasters, early entry almost pays for itself!) If you’re interested, act fast by clicking HERE!

For the list, we’ve assembled a motley assortment of styles, from the traditional and classic to the what-were-they-smoking? All twenty Belgian-style beers are brewed locally by some of our favorite Oregon brewers and we’re happy to report that they’ve really outdone themselves this year. Take a look at our nearly complete list below and keep your ears and eyes open in the following days for further details and reveals!

• Gigantic The Royale
• Breakside Pumpkin Bier de Garde
• The Commons Plum Bretta
• Silver Moon Oak Aged Purgatory’s Shadow
• Block15 Framboise White
• Laurelwood  Sour Barrel Aged Cardinal Sin
• Flat Tail Bourbon Barrel Dark Strong Sour w/ figs
• Old Town Wit
• Pfriem Tripel
• Boneyard Bonehead
• 10 Barrel Belgian Holiday Ale (Nitro!)
• Rogue Batch 15K Belgian Stout
• Hopworks Abbey
• Upright/Bushwhacker Blend
• Logsdon Oak Aged Seizoen Bretta
• Lompoc Le Chat Noir (2009)
• Pints Evil Twin Dark Saison
• Deschutes Bier de Garde
• Burnside International Incident (Sour & Gin Barrel Aged)
• Cascade TBA

WARNING! THE FOLLOWING BLOG POST HAS NEXT-TO-NOTHING TO DO WITH TOMORROW’S STELLAR LINE-UP OF AWESOME, KILLER BREWS AT BAILEY’S TAPROOM FROM 2 PM UNTIL MIDNIGHT. FOR THE FULL LIST AND FURTHER DETAILS, GO HERE. FOR A COUPLE OF CHEAP LAUGHS AT THE EXPENSE OF ANGELO DE IESO, GOOD TASTE, AND RIGHT-WING REPUBLICANS, CONTINUE READING!

It was my understanding when I settled down to write my three-part novella about Angelo De Ieso II back in May that he was actually leaving Oregon for good and that KBF 3.5 would be the final sequel in the beer-killing horror genre saga; it was supposed to be the one where that seri-ale killer got so blasted there was no way it was gonna stagger back up again to fill another pint glass.

So I used every last hyperbole, strained every hackneyed turn of phrase, and doled out a year’s worth of flamboyant metaphors to send off the king of Brewpublic in a meteoric haze of good will and bad writing. Exhausted and spent from the effort, I took my usual three-month hiatus from writing this blog…

…and then the Boston Bastard showed up at our door with KBF 4 posters.

That’s right. Just when you thought it was safe for you to go out again, here comes KillerBeer, jumping down throats, intoxicating minds, and raping livers.

But for me, KillerBeer provides an even greater threat. How in the world am I going to top my previous efforts of calling Angelo a “Satan worshipping Anti-Christ” or a “stone cold gangster who has been intimidating craft brewers in the Pacific Northwest for the past fourteen years”? And while I’m asking rhetorical questions, what the hell is Angelo doing back in Portland? Doesn’t that guy live in California now?

I was actually sitting here, trying to rationalize how I run into this guy more often when he lives 600 miles away than when he was just on the other side of the Columbia River when I heard a knocking on my front door. I opened it to see a familiar face from the craft beer industry. “Hey there Ez—” I was interrupted when he clamped a hand over my mouth and led me inside.

After the door had been locked, the curtains drawn, and the light fixtures checked for any listening devices, the gentleman in question, who has requested that I refer to him only as “Six-Pack,” told me a story that should have Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman dusting off the typewriter props and breaking out the bellbottoms again.

“Haven’t you ever wondered why Brewpublic formed in 2008?” he asked me.

I hadn’t thought of it and told him so.

“What else happened in 2008?” he asked. When I looked at him puzzled for longer than a second, he answered his own question. “Hope and change mean anything to you?”

According to Six-Pack, Angelo De Ieso II saw the writing on the wall back then, and knew that a Kenyan with a Hawaiian birth certificate would be the next President of the United States. “Okay, so what?” I said.

“Let me put it this way,” he said. “Don’t you find it strange that the upcoming election is as close as it is? How could Mitt Romney be leading in any state outside of Alabama, Mississippi, and Texas, let alone neck-and-neck with Obama? Sure, if you take the whole nation-is-a-car-stuck-in-the-ditch analogy, we’ve barely got two wheels out of the mud and though we’ve got the engine idling, it’s also making some weird wheezing noises. But you know Romney’s going to take a sledgehammer to the car and then give away all the shiny cool parts to his favorite rich friends.”

“Hey, man,” I interjected, “You said it, not me! I don’t want to talk politics on the Bailey’s blog. I might end up offending some angry, old, rich, white dudes, and that’s the majority of our customers between 4-7 PM Monday through Friday!”

“Fine, fine. Look, I’m trying to tell you something here. Angelo saw all this coming. He’s playing the long-game. And the prize? The presidency of the United States of America!”

WTF!! What will happen next? Click on through for the harrowing conclusion!

For most of the country, summer’s end is met with relief. Soaring high temperatures, balmy humidity, extreme thunderstorms, and a profligacy of buzzing, biting insects are just a few of the seasonal nuisances that have taken their toll by mid-September. However, here in the Northwest, the summer means something else entirely: mild heat and ubiquitous blue skies and an escape from the clouds and rain that plague us the rest of the year. So it is that around this time every year, we feel a little melancholy about the changing of the seasons… until, that is, we find our consolation in the autumn harvest and in the beers that benefit from it.

Today we’re highlighting six gourd-geous pumpkin ales from Elysian, the brewery that has cemented itself as the Northwest’s premier purveyor of pumpkin beer. Along with our generous assortment of fresh hop beers currently on tap, there’s no question that Bailey’s has fully embraced the fall, even if the weather outside still feels a little warm (and sunny) for the season.

Here’s a breakdown of the six Elysian pumpkin beers you can expect to find on tap today:

-Night Owl- Elysian’s classic pumpkin ale, with cinnamon and nutmeg aplenty.

-The Great Pumpkin- An imperial pumpkin ale, which means a stronger, sweeter, fuller bodied ale that gets closer to replicating the rich flavors of pumpkin pie.

-Dark O’ The Moon- An imperial pumpkin porter, which adds chewy, chocolatey malts to the mix.

-Blight- Another off-the-wall entry in the Apocalypse series of beers, this imperial pumpkin ale also features brown sugar and fiery Vietnamese cinnamon.

-Hansel & Gretel- The lightest pumpkin beer, this pilsner features a little ginger as well.

-Hop Squash- A collaboration brew with Ninkasi, this first-of-its-kind Pumpkin IPA joins our two favorite fall harvest ingredients to duke it out in the glass.

Five Years Later from Michael O’Connor on Vimeo.

Earlier in the week, the By the Numbers blog was an attempt to reconcile the enormous amount of business the bar has generated over the past five years with something slightly more precise than the usual hyperbole. In the same vein, it occurred to me that the last five years have gone by pretty quickly and that while change happens slowly, it also happens dramatically, especially in retrospect.

And so it seemed only fitting to chronicle that passage of time in the most interesting (and potentially most embarrassing) way possible: to share a visual representation of the bar’s history, not through the physical changes in the bar itself, but rather through the physical changes of the people who have imbued Bailey’s with the personality, humor, and knowledge that we think has been as crucial to our success as the tap lineup; or in other words, the staff.

It’s also a great way for me to gauge whether any of my coworkers snuck the Holy Grail past Indiana Jones and Sean Connery while that Nazi chick was falling to her death, because dammit, these gray hairs aren’t going away on their own.

Below are ‘now and then’ photos, with the ‘now’ photos from 2012 and the ‘then’ photos from 2007 (or as close as we could find).

Geoffrey Phillips (Proprietor/Head Honcho/Master of His Domain)

Now:

Then:

Nick Rivers (Tech Guru/Web Maestro/Groupie)

Now:

Then:

Michael O’Connor (Beer Buyer/Blogger/Asshole)

Now:

Then:

Scott Jester (Beertender/Life of the Party/Physically Incapable of Finding His Own Goddamn Photos)

Now:

Then:

*Note: According to Mr. Jester, there is no visual documentation of his having existed before the year 2010, so be forewarned, this is apparently the youngest that Mr. Jester has ever looked.

Fortunately, there’s this thing called the Internet that helps you find all sorts of interesting stuff. Like this, for instance:

William J. Murnighan aka “Bill” (Beertender/Beatsmith/Male Model)

Now:

Then:

*Not that different, right? But check out this photo from 2006:

Janelle Harrie (Beertender/New Blood/The Classy One)

Now:

Then: