Grossest Beer Name Ever?

Ah, the power of marketing! Whether we realize it or not, colorful illustrations, cool packaging and especially clever or quirky names influence our consumption habits. And why should it be any different with beer, especially since the craft beer revolution has brought with it such a tongue-in-cheek disposition about the whole enterprise.

We thought we had heard and seen just about the silliest, strangest, and cleverest beer names around, but how about the grossest?

That dubious honor has been bestowed upon Firestone Walker’s Velvet Merkin. This one initially went over my head, having no idea of what a “merkin” was until a customer with a superior vocabulary filled me in (how embarrassing for an English major!).

For those not in the know, a merkin, as defined by Dictionary.Com is “false hair for the female pudenda.”

And a “pudenda”? “The external genital organs, esp. those of the female; vulva.”

So there you have it. A vagina wig.

The irony is that the beer itself is an absolutely delicious blend of oatmeal, chocolate, and coffee, all smoothed out and creamy due to some subtle bourbon barrel aging. But really, once I said “vagina wig,” does it even matter if it’s good or not?

One response

  1. Your “customer with a superior vocabulary” either has some strange hobbies or, more likely (I hope), he is a fan of Pearl Jam. Many people learned what a merkin was after Pearl Jam collaboated with Neil Young to release the Merkinball EP a few years ago.

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